ODD, Does my teen have a choice?

Raising my children to be productive members of their community is a goal that is important to me as a mother. Being a parent of three teenagers is a daily full time job that brings a lot of happiness and fun, but also delivers a healthy helping of frustration and disappointment. I believe it is human nature to want to “pass the buck” and blame others for the poor choices we make. As an adult, at times I catch myself dodging accountability and responsibility. Teenagers are professionals at it. Teaching our teens to be accountable for their choices is crucial to their success. The following article gives great insight into how we perceive personal choices.

How often do you say, “I didn’t have a choice” or “I don’t have a choice?” If you start to pay attention to the words you say I would bet it’s more often than you think. What would you say if I told you that no matter what, you ALWAYS have a choice? 

I think it is incredibly empowering to look inside yourself and say, this was my choice. Then you can accept your situation and make better choices to improve it.

Robert F. Bennett the US Senator for Utah said, “Your life is the sum result of all the choices you make, both consciously and unconsciously. If you can control the process of choosing, you can take control of all aspects of your life. You can find the freedom that comes from being in charge of yourself.”

As long as you think you don’t have a choice you will be taking or maintaining a victim position. If you don’t have a choice, then you can’t do anything about your situation and that includes improve it.

Why would we want to hold onto our belief that there is no choice? Is it so that we can be the victim, so that it is not our fault that we are in the situation we are in? Is it so that we have someone else to blame?

We can’t change other people, but we can certainly change ourselves. That’s a beautiful thing because when we accept that we do have a choice, we can change our own actions and become the person that we want to be. No one holds a gun to your head and says this is what you must believe. This is how you must act. Even if someone was holding a gun to your head you still have a choice.

The best thing about taking responsibility for your own situation and who and what and where you are in life is that when you do, you can change it. And that is powerful.

Choices and Personal responsibility By Sharmen Lane http://www.sharspeaks.com/articles/choices_and_responsibility.htm