We often glibly talk about Peer Pressure but it affects everyone; teens and adults alike. Buddies, co-workers, friends and even strangers can have an effect on what we do.
As parents our radar often goes into hyper-mode when it comes to teenagers. Where are they? Who are they with? What are they doing? Who is driving? When will they be home? Are they getting into trouble? Are they being supervised? What will I do if they do not come home on time? What if they get into trouble with the law? Are they drinking or using drugs? Etc., etc., etc.
Our teens are growing up. They are transitioning into adulthood. They are becoming independent. They want to cut the proverbial apron strings, yet they need a life line at the same time. They want to be socially accepted by their friends. We have seen numerous trends over the years where teenagers try to separate themselves and yet maintain some type of identity.
Most of these are just fads. They come and they go. Things like style and length of hair (spiky, colored blue, red, yellow, green, etc., long, short, shaved, straight, curly, crimped); style of clothing (micro, mini, short and long skirts and shorts, bell bottom, hip huggers and skinny jeans, belly shirts, etc.); shoes (spiked heels, wedges, boots, various styles of athletic shoes); tattoos; piercings, music and cars.
Our main concern is teaching the morals and values that we feel are important. This comes long before our children become teens. Creating an environment of open communication is one of the best things we can do for our kids.
Listen to what your kids have to say. Try not to judge them. Let them tell you how they feel and value those feelings. Be respectful. You might not agree but you will instill in them a sense of self worth.
Our teenager’s friends are definitely going to influence them. When you notice your son or daughter and/or their friends behaving inappropriately, talk to about it when the friend has gone home. Discuss the behavior. Talk about the consequences of the behavior. It could be drinking, drug abuse, swearing, acting rudely, fighting, being defiant, being disrespectful to others, destroying property, acting immaturely or being angry.
We want our teens to think for them self. Remember, they will make mistakes. Be supportive when this happens.
Parents have a strong influence on their kids. Don’t miss the opportunity to talk with your son or daughter.
